Close the blinds and lower the shades; pull out that voodoo doll you had made by the high priestess and stick pins in the genital region. Do this while she is at work.
Stand in front of mirror, with a small candle and chant, “I am beautiful, I am beautiful, I am the light.” (Be careful not to drop hot wax on your winky)
Go through the entire residence and set fire to any remnant of the Bitch. This includes:
- Clothing: Especially any underwear she left (Use rubber gloves)
- Photos: Take a sharp pair of scissors and cut out the eyes. Take a black sharpie marker and add highlights to the Bitch’s face
- CDs: any musical item which will bring back stabbing painful memories
- Any remaining condoms, birth control pills, IUDs, contraceptive foam, Spermicidal Jelly, Quaker State 10w40, the butane torch since she was a frigid Bitch
- Any other item you feel will purge your soul of the Bitch. (Like an exorcism from your local priest)
Replace the CDs you just set fire to with some of the following suggestions:
- Love Stinks â€” J. Geils Band
- What it takes â€” Aerosmith
- Bitch Is Back â€” Elton John
- Hair of the Dog â€” Nazareth (or lesser version by Guns and Roses)
- I Will Survive â€” Gloria Gaynor
- Here’s a Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares â€” Travis Tritt
- You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling â€” The Righteous Brothers
- Go Your Own Way â€” Fleetwood Mac
Set aside a certain day, & on this day, call every mutual friend that you shared with the BITCH. Keep the conversations short, do not take any breaks between the calls, and just keep your negativity running nonstop. After the entire day of doing this, you’ll be so sick of hearing yourself whine that you probably won’t mention the Bitch again for a long, long time.
Well you are close to being finishedâ€¦ Just a few more thingsâ€¦ Repeat positive phrases about yourself, over and over again, (until infinity) to remind yourself that YOU are not a reflection of the BITCH. YOU ARE GREAT. You are loved. You will go on, perhaps smarter? But definitely better then ever, and stronger then ever.
PS: It certainly does not hurt to discover that the only time the bitch ever visited her soon to be hubby was to help him move since he was evicted from his apartment and he has been out of work for a long time. She lied to you about him taking care of her. She does not even know Canadian law pertaining to citizenship and ownership of property so she is an utter dumb-ass in that aspect and she might even already be pregnant with a bastard child. And she called YOU a LOSER???????!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A DUMB ASS!