SAN MATEO, CAâ€”â€œI canâ€™t believe that stupid bitch in front of me is talking on her cell phone,â€ reported Greg Patterson, 36, as he crawled along in bumper-to-bumper traffic yesterday on his way to work. â€œI mean, sheâ€™s been gabbing on that thing for like 10 miles already. How the hell am I supposed to finish shaving if I have to keep a constant eye on her while sheâ€™s on that thing?â€ asked the half shaven Patterson. â€œItâ€™s bad enough I almost spilled my lattÃ© back at the interchange when I was trying to get the latest stock quotes off my Palm Pilot, but now I have to worry about some stupid bitch on her cell phone? There should be a law against those things,â€ he concluded.
As for the stupid bitch in front of Patterson, she added, â€œI had to call the daycare and tell them to give my son his medicine every 4 hours. I forgot to tell them that when I dropped him off this morning.â€
â€œUh, whatever,â€ responded a frazzled Patterson. Then, changing the subject, â€œHey, check out this new CD I got yesterday. Itâ€™s got this really cool song on it. Letâ€™s see, what track was that?â€ Patterson then slammed into the stupid bitchâ€™s car in front of him as he searched for the desired track. â€œFuck!â€ he screamed. â€œI knew that stupid bitch would cause an accident!â€